|She knew.We didn't.|
I am a weenie when it comes to illness. That is probably the result of having been blessed with great genes and the fact that I have been blessed with great health throughout my 60 years. It is not all attributable to clean. healthy living. The fact that I survived the fall of 1977 through 1984 is a gift from the Angels.
For the first time since my flu event that began New Years Eve 1998, I have been sick enough to require more than one day away from work. Yes, more than 20 years. I am used to feeling great most of the time. But a sinus infection has stopped me in my tracks. If you look up symptoms of a sinus infection, I've experienced every one in some form over the past 10 days. I kept thinking it would get better. I haven't had a serious sinus infection since 1997. I was also concerned about developing pneumonia and decided to visit my internist, hoping he would allay my fear of pneumonia and give me a miracle drug to make it all go away.
As I was walking into the Medical Arts Building II, I was all of a sudden overcome with grief and guilt that I, a person with a mere sinus infection, had carried anger at my mom for 2 1/2 years for giving up, at the age of 86, after bilateral breast cancer, fractured vertebrae, and the knowledge her cancer had returned for a third time. I cried at my lack of empathy for all she had been through, even though I knew what she had experienced, because I'd felt in some way she should have fought to stay with us. That was selfish. After just one week of my feeling terrible, I know that my new prescription for Amoxicillin will have me back in my state of normalcy in a few days. I don't know how I would deal with the knowledge it was never going to be better?
Sometime an unexpected negative can have some positive results.