Call it experience, wisdom, unsolicited opinion or communion with the Universe, but many of us who have reached a certain age have accepted that happiness is a state of mind and nobody else can bestow that state upon us.
I reflect on this question because at the moment my husband and I have several friends or acquaintances that are in situations where they are aspiring to make another individual happy. This is the wrong approach in my humble opinion. Instead, I believe the road to peace, serenity, contentment and even happiness is to follow one’s heart, decide what one needs to live a fulfilled life and to refuse to compromise in order to retain, maintain or engage in a relationship.
One of my friends from my former life, Georgy Ziengs, always told me to eat dessert first because life is short. I’ve embraced Georgy’s wisdom and made the conscious decision to avoid compromise when it comes to celebrating who I am at my very core. People either like me or they don’t. I’ve decided to embrace who I am and to share my life with somebody else who will not only accept me as I am but who celebrates me with all of my facets – good, less good, challenging and delightful!
I’ve learned that it is not my place to give advice to others because I do not walk in his or her shoes. But I will encourage my friends and acquaintances to honor who they are, to refrain from settling for what they perceive they want, and to engage in some self-reflection to decide what they really want.
It is heart-breaking to see people we care about suffering because of fear of the unknown, being alone, splitting up financial assets, feeling inadequate or appearing a failure for being unable to make a relationship work.
It takes courage and a certain amount of fortitude to make painful decisions and move on with life. But in the end, it is the healthiest way to life. Life passes in an instant and I intend to live every moment to its fullest. I will not settle!
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