Friday, February 6, 2015

The Small Decision I Made 10 Years Ago That Changed My Life~

Ten years ago today, February 6, 2005, I took a risk that changed my life. Everyday since has been miraculous.

My story actually began the previous October before Halloween. At the age of 45 after years of dysfunctional relationships, I’d found sanity through Al Anon and spirituality through Doreen Virtue and yoga and divested myself of the most recent debacle of a significant other. I made a list of the qualities that I wanted in a life partner, edited, re-edited, checked it twice, three times, fourteen times, and then asked my angels and the universe to bring us together.

I subscribed to some online dating sights and had a lot of one-date wonders. But I knew my angels would bring me together with the right person at the right time. I had faith. But I also limited myself based upon my own prejudices – particularly with geographic location and the composition of the profile photo.

But I had an epiphany while enjoying a cruise in the Caribbean with my parental units, one of their best friends, and my brother and his now second ex-wife.  I decided I deserved happiness, joy, fulfillment, excitement, comfort, love and fun and that it just my require me stepping outside of my comfort zone.

When I arrived at my home after the holiday, I decided to broaden my opportunities and consider men outside my original narrow field of vision.  Ten years ago today I made the decision to respond to a contact from a man who was adorable with an amusing profile that was in a relatively inconvenient location and posted a cheesy photo of himself. We exchanged emails and I jumped off the ledge and gave him my cell phone number.

Tomorrow we celebrate the 10th anniversary of our first meeting, which we cherish more than our wedding anniversary. For both of us, it was a meeting that changed our lives.  From the first meeting we never looked back. He actually has 95% of the characteristics and qualities I wrote on my list, which I still carry in my wallet today.

Today, everyday is filled with gratitude. We met at the right time in our lives. We’d learned from prior relationships to accept one another as we are without judgment, to allow one another to enjoy activities and interests separately, to overlook petty annoyances, and to celebrate the experiences we share with gratitude.

My spiritual journey gave me the tools to appreciate a healthy relationship. I learned that I have no control over other people, places and things and that I have no right to try to change somebody. Experience teaches me to appreciate that if I try I will fail. I learned to embrace change.  I learned to think positively and to focus on my blessings.  I learned that it is important to show a loved one he or she is appreciated every day.

I urge you all to take a chance. You never know where it may lead.

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