Ten years ago today, February 6, 2005, I took a risk that
changed my life. Everyday since has been miraculous.
My
story actually began the previous October before Halloween. At the age of 45
after years of dysfunctional relationships, I’d found sanity through Al Anon
and spirituality through Doreen Virtue and yoga and divested myself of the most
recent debacle of a significant other. I made a list of the qualities that I
wanted in a life partner, edited, re-edited, checked it twice, three times,
fourteen times, and then asked my angels and the universe to bring us together.
I
subscribed to some online dating sights and had a lot of one-date wonders. But
I knew my angels would bring me together with the right person at the right
time. I had faith. But I also limited myself based upon my own prejudices –
particularly with geographic location and the composition of the profile photo.
But
I had an epiphany while enjoying a cruise in the Caribbean with my parental
units, one of their best friends, and my brother and his now second
ex-wife. I decided I deserved happiness,
joy, fulfillment, excitement, comfort, love and fun and that it just my require
me stepping outside of my comfort zone.
When
I arrived at my home after the holiday, I decided to broaden my opportunities
and consider men outside my original narrow field of vision. Ten years ago today I made the decision to
respond to a contact from a man who was adorable with an amusing profile that
was in a relatively inconvenient location and posted a cheesy photo of himself.
We exchanged emails and I jumped off the ledge and gave him my cell phone
number.
Tomorrow
we celebrate the 10th anniversary of our first meeting, which we
cherish more than our wedding anniversary. For both of us, it was a meeting
that changed our lives. From the first
meeting we never looked back. He actually has 95% of the characteristics and
qualities I wrote on my list, which I still carry in my wallet today.
Today,
everyday is filled with gratitude. We met at the right time in our lives. We’d
learned from prior relationships to accept one another as we are without
judgment, to allow one another to enjoy activities and interests separately, to
overlook petty annoyances, and to celebrate the experiences we share with
gratitude.
My
spiritual journey gave me the tools to appreciate a healthy relationship. I
learned that I have no control over other people, places and things and that I
have no right to try to change somebody. Experience teaches me to appreciate
that if I try I will fail. I learned to embrace change. I learned to think positively and to focus on
my blessings. I learned that it is
important to show a loved one he or she is appreciated every day.
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