The Original Not Ready for Primetime Players

The Original Not Ready for Primetime Players

Every once in a while I’m filled with nostalgia for the classic SNL skits by the original Not Ready for Primetime Players.

Most recently, while my husband was watching “Jaws” I burst out in a guffaw that was followed by a snort because “Jaws” always reminds me of the  “Land Shark” candy gram skits from the first season.  The Land Shark would prey on unsuspecting people, knocking on doors and using subterfuge to gain access:

            The scene: A NYC apartment. There is a knock on the door…

            Lorraine Newman / through the door: Yes?


Shark: Mrs. Arlsburgerhhh?


Lorraine Newman: Who?


Shark: Flowers.


Lorraine Newman: Flowers for whom?
V

Shark: Plumber, ma'am.


Lorraine Newman: I don't need a plumber. You're that clever shark, aren't                                        you?


Shark: Candy  gram.


Lorraine Newman: Candy gram, my foot! You get out of here before I call

                                    the police! You're the shark, and you know it!

Shark:  Wait.  I'm only a dolphin, ma'am.


Lorraine Newman: A dolphin? Well... Okay.

She opens the door, the big fake shark chomps on her head and the Jaws music plays.

Few comedy routines continue to resonate with me over 35 years. But to me this is one of the classics from the original season. I can still laugh just as the word “candy gram”!

Only the dead parrot sketch by Monty Python comes close. Okay – I also still laugh at Emily Litella’s  commentary /opposing views on “Weekend Update” discussing "saving Soviet jewelry “, "endangered feces” "violins on television", "presidential erections ", "youth in Asia “ . Occasionally, at the oddest times, like pulling into a parking space at Target,  I’ll think of “violins on television” and crack myself up.  Oh - “Never mind”….”it won’t happen again – bitch!”