Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Little Decisions with Significant Outcomes

Little Decisions with Significant Outcomes

Eight years ago today I returned to my home in Maryland after a lovely week on a cruise in the Caribbean celebrating my parents’ 50th wedding anniversary.  My generous mom and dad had invited at their expense their offspring to join them to commemorate this momentous occasion.

I was between relationships having a few months previously divested myself of a most unsuitable companion with whom I had spent a few dysfunctional years. But I am of the opinion that experiencing terrible relationships helps one to appreciate a good one when blessed.  After spiritual healing, finding peace within myself, and really focusing on the type of relationship that I wanted and deserved, I made a list, checked it twice, and began to visualize and ask my higher power to deliver.

My intent was companionship.  Convenience was also a factor. I was living in Frederick, Maryland at the time and commuting to Baltimore. My initial forays into online dating had resulted in some interesting but uninspiring dates. But I was expanding my horizons – to a point.

While enjoying the cruise and sharing a cabin with a close friend of my parental units, I realized that if I did not broaden my horizons, this could be my future – I envisioned accompanying my mom and dad on trips as a companion, (not that there’s anything wrong with that) but I realized this was not what I wanted. Perhaps I was being a little too narrow in my focus. I decided that in reviewing online profiles and persons who exhibited interest that perhaps, I should open my mind to those who were a little less convenient or who wore unfortunate outfits in their profile photos.

So, the day after I returned to my humble abode, I responded to a contact from a man who had an amusing profile, but was living an hour in the opposite direction of optimum convenience and was wearing a “tank tee shirt” in his profile photo. Ugh! But he was really cute and with newfound resolve, I responded to a several week’s old contact with a witty response via email through Yahoo personals. This happened to be the singular most influential small decision that I’ve made in the past 10 years. I responded to a contact. I opened myself to options I might not otherwise have considered.   I found the man of my dreams, my heart of hearts, and my soul mate with that small decision.  I learned to take a chance and look outside my boundaries and it was the best decision I’ve ever made.

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